Stagger Not

When Paul was here earlier this month, he shared a scripture with the YSA which has resounded in my head ever since.  In his letter to the Romans, the apostle Paul tells of the great faith of Abraham.  This eminent patriarch and his wife Sarah had been promised, through the Abrahamic covenant, that their posterity would become a great nation as impossible to number as the sands of the sea, and that this nation would bless all the world through the priesthood.  All of these blessings were to come through a covenant child.  The promises must have seemed impossible as Abraham neared his hundredth birthday and after Sarah had endured 70 plus years of childlessness, and yet Paul says in Romans 4:20-21:

“He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God; And being fully persuaded that, what he had promised, he was able also to perform.”

Those are the words that have echoed in my head and in my heart for the past two weeks, “he staggered not at the promise of God”.  I have reviewed my life with my multiple “staggerings” and have longed for and determined to acquire a faith like Abraham’s.  Each time I stagger, I pay a price.   Because I have no shame, and because I sincerely want my children and grandchildren to learn from my mistakes, I share a recent example.  In August of last year I wrote of some financial concerns.  I told of watching the numbers from Wall Street as they went lower with each passing day.  Would we have any of our meager savings left by the time this mission was over?  I wrote about an answer to my personal prayers:

“He knew of my worry over the stock market--a very specific one. While studying for a seminary lesson, I came across this quote from Elder Holland as he encouraged couples to serve missions.  “Those of you who can, put away your golf clubs, don’t worry about the stock market, realize that your grandchildren will still be your grandchildren when you return—and go!  We promise you the experience of a lifetime.”  It was all I needed to hear.  The Spirit whispered that it was true.  The Lord has always provided all that we need, He will continue to do so.  I have always known that when we put the Lord first, He takes care of the rest.  I just needed a reminder.”

Here was a promise from the Lord that He would watch after our finances as we served. I did not need to keep my eye on the Dow Jones Index.  I had faith…at least for a time.  And then I staggered.  I saw the Dow Jones numbers start to climb, and I started to wonder, “Should we pull our money out and make sure it is safe?”  I asked John.  I asked people I trusted (the arm of flesh).  When the numbers went over 12,000, I pulled everything out.  What a relief, right?  This week I cringe as the news reports the Dow Jones is over 13,000. Had I been “fully persuaded” that God was able to perform all that He  promised, we would have had more in savings when we got home than we did when we left. This “stagger” cost us a few thousand dollars, and although it hurts some, it is a small price to pay for a lesson of eternal value. 

Other staggers rob me of my peace and sometimes lead to despair.  They are the worst staggers of all.  These, like Abraham’s and Sarah’s wonderings, usually have to do with covenant promises concerning family and the eternities. Through prophets and through private witnesses of the Holy Ghost, the Lord has promised me specific blessings concerning my family—things that at times seem as impossible as Sarah giving birth. Those promises are more important to me than any amount of money.  I cling to them with all of my faith, and I know that  I will not stagger if I can remember what Abraham was told in Genesis 18:14, “Is any thing too hard for the Lord?” 

As I discussed these things this week with my sister-in-law, she encouraged me to keep reading in Romans 5.  Thank you Rosie, for there I found the beautiful fruits of those who “stagger not”.  Romans 5:1-5:

“Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ: By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.  And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”

Those who stagger not gain peace, patience and experience and are filled with faith, hope and love.  May we all pray for and be blessed with the faith of our father, Abraham.